POETRY: I'm your first trimester

I’m your first trimester

I’m sorry that, for the past week, I’ve undercooked your food.
It’s only mild food poisoning. And, after all, I’m yet to tell you
About the microgynon 30 I’ve been grinding up
into all of your meals. That’s why you were late this month.

I’ve been purposefully keeping you on a fibre-free diet,
because it was the only way to ensure you’d get constipated.
And that tenderness of the breasts – in all honesty,
you sleep really heavily, and I’ve been prodding them nightly.

As for the fatigue and mood swings, you supplied that yourself.
You’re a grumpy old mare. It’s not really cynicism that caused me
to do this. Don’t think of yourself as my lab-rat.
More of a colleague – a partner, if you will.

I can’t explain it, but I’ll try – you’ve got that look in your eye
so I know you’re a bit angry. I just wanted to see how you’d react.
Not to see if you’d want to keep our child, nothing like that.
Just to get a better understanding of how your mind works.

Michael Kilburn